A Neighborhood Affair

Hello?

Hi, this is Janice. Is Larry around?

No, no he’s out right now. Can I take a message for you?

Sure! If you could just let him know that Janice was wondering if he could help her take her top off, I’d really appreciate it.

Sounds goo- Wait, I’m sorry, what?

If you could just let him know that I was hoping he could help me take my top off.

I’m sorry, you are aware who you are talking to, right?

Yes, of course. This is Larry’s wife. Your name is Sarah, yes?

Yes, that’s me.

Is there a problem?

Well I just think it’s a little unusual that you want my husband to help you take your top off.

You see, the thing is, I’ve had it on all winter, and I figure it’s about time. You know I just can’t do it by myself.

What? Of course you can. I take my top off by myself every day.

You do? Then you’re a stronger woman than I am.

Now let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. Why do you want my husband to take your top off?

Well, like I said, it’s getting warmer now and I’m looking for a change. There’s just something so wonderful about that rush, you see.

The rush?

Oh you know, that feeling you get when your top is off. The wind on your face, the sun in your hair, great music playing on the radio. There’s nothing else quite like it. You don’t get that when you’re driving yours?

Driving? I’m not sure I follow you.

Driving your Jeep Wrangler with the top off. Like I said, I’m not strong enough to take mine off on my own, and I just thought since he has a Jeep as well your husband might be able to help. What on earth did you think we were talking about?

I just thought… never mind. I’ll let Larry know you called.

Thanks, Sarah.

No problem, Janice.

Oh, and Sarah, before I go: do you know if your son would want to help me shave my back?